The Nature of Learning

The Nature of Learning https://amzn.eu/d/brdBu02

I have recently condensed these poems into a little book called The Nature of Learning, available on Amazon. It is only 34 pages, but each poem is a chunk of my heart. I have wrote some of these poems in the hardest times of my life, and they mean everything to me. It’s based around Nature, as that is what has given me the most clarify, and helped me get through some hard days. I just want my words to resonate, to create a safe space, and to know that you’re not alone. Love always, Amy x

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Rose Bush

I could tell you about how rose bush guided me

How she paved my way

Even the man who planted her beside me

And told me to follow her to the end

I shouldn’t have trusted him with rose bush

With his hands he misused her

Something so pretty

Leading you somewhere so grey

I never went back there

Each thorn penetrated my skin so deep

The easiest way was to pretend

But he used rose bush to fool me

I followed her for 3 days

No sleep, running on fumes

Hiding, running from fumes

Each car passed, I thought it was the end

But rose bush will stay with me forever

Because when I reached the end

I found myself

Healing

Sometimes we need to heal our childhood self

to just feel back when times were quiet

a box of rice crispies falling off the top shelf

where milk and cereal were the only diet

a selection box where you never wanted cornflakes

but it was so exciting to take your pick

sometimes thats all it would really take

to make your whole day feel more magic

bouncing on the trampoline in your school shirt

before Mom would call you in for tea

white, now covered in leaves and dirt

building a den with bedsheets under a tree

Today I decided to watch Winnie The Pooh

to connect with the child inside me

to feel that peace, and to say thank you

for playing in the sun under that tree

as that’s when my love for nature grew

playing in the garden until the sun sleeps

sometimes I need to reach the girl I once knew

to take back those memories that she keeps

Sex

How to pleasure a woman is boasted

How to caress her body is taught

When they discuss how she tasted

Like it wasn’t a sacred act

If you want to know how to pleasure a woman

Why don’t you ask her?

She will always know better than you

But arrogance is paramount

And we’re too embarrassed

To tell you how we really like it

To pleasure a woman is to nourish her soul

We have enough knowledge to teach the male sex

How to have sex

How to caresses a body without a touch

To not assume we all like it rough

We sometimes put it down to low sex drive

When really – they just don’t know how to please us right

A solar sentence

I can’t tell you where I’ve been 

I don’t even know myself 

Somewhere dark around corners where

Men heckle at women and we hide 

Around corners, in the dark 

From the men who shout at us 

Pretty words and vocal slurs 

We must hide in the dark 

The light doesn’t even offer us freedom 

They have taken it all from us 

The sun can only protect me for 12 hours 

It blinds me whilst closing its eyes 

Before the moon shows us what we fear

If I imagine the moon to be yellow 

And the darkness to not be so bright 

Will the men still hurt us 

Around dark corners where they lurk 

Where I hide, will they still join us

Or can we be left in peace 

To tell the moon our secrets

The bees healed me

The bees healed me

Each flower they pollinated woven into my skin

A seamstress by day, my own body for design

He sewed ivy into my tongue so that I could not speak

But silenced again I will not be

I took out the stitches and a sunflower replaced it

After you left me bare

The bees made me a new dress

With honey they caressed me

I rolled in grass and the daisies joined me

Together we are strong and bright

I embraced my old cast iron Singer

Cobwebs danced around it

An old story told whilst a new story unfolds

The bees chose daffodils this time

With each stitch my old skin faded

Now it’s like he never touched me

I can lay back under the sun

Whilst the bees feed me, once more

Home comfort

I told you I was going home

But I don’t know where that is

As when you left me on that day

Home did no longer exist

You left me cold, in rain soaked slippers

I walked past all those family homes

Fires lit where children whispered

Of life where love was all that’s known

The street lamp flickered as I wondered on

Past a bungalow in the shadow of the moon

He wondered what I was running from

But not what I was running too

As he watched in the window, I put up my hood

I kept my dressing gown on for comfort

To keep hold of my home before I leave it for good

To start my journey in the thunder

Feeling music

Oh you can wait

But I’ve waited for so long

I’ve listened to the radio everyday, waiting to hear that song

I can’t put my finger on which one

Just one that makes me feel

A memory from my childhood

Or something that wasn’t real

Something once created in my head

Which my mind is trying to claw back

Reminiscing on things that weren’t even said

In a pantomime that I have to act

Maybe the smell of freshly cut grass

Before school when I’d open my window

Or walking to work on that same path

That I first heard Take Care years ago

When Mom used to play Aretha Franklin

She’d say a little prayer for me

Now even when I’m panicking

I can hear it playing so clearly

Morning walks with wet hair

I never learned my lesson

I can’t catch a cold out there

If I welcome it as a blessing

Maybe Blackbird by the Beatles

Or Cherry Wine by Hozier

The sound of birds could defeat it all

Or maybe I just need some closure

Redbone by Gambino

Or even Feels like Summer

As even goosebumps I feel, though

That warmth is never far from her

Eating alone

I fear that you’ll never let go

I’ve tried ushering you away

Like an ant in a built-up town

I’m trying to find you a new home

I am a tired bee and I’ve pollenated you

But you’ve run out of sugar water

You used it all in the cups of tea I made us

They’ve gone cold and the kettle has run out of water

Like a pigeon eating out the palm of a child

You peck until my hands are sore

These hands need to be preserved

So I can build you a new home

You drain me like pasta water

I can add it to my cooking but I want to eat alone

I only lit a candle for one

I know you hold enough fire for us both

But I don’t want to feel that heat anymore

I must let go of the old me

Hovis

So much joy in the littlest being

You make my day without even seeing

The small things to me, to you life’s greatest pleasure

Sitting in that circle window, peering out at your leisure

Heart of a lion, yet so caring and gentle

Just an animal, yet so sentimental

You speak in codes, which I can decrypt with feeling

The part in me which I needed healing

Your rough tongue on my nose, a symbol of affection

You sit at my feet, you are my protection

I hope til’ I’m 40, that you’ll still be with me

In an ideal world, forever my best friend you will be