Healing

Sometimes we need to heal our childhood self

to just feel back when times were quiet

a box of rice crispies falling off the top shelf

where milk and cereal were the only diet

a selection box where you never wanted cornflakes

but it was so exciting to take your pick

sometimes thats all it would really take

to make your whole day feel more magic

bouncing on the trampoline in your school shirt

before Mom would call you in for tea

white, now covered in leaves and dirt

building a den with bedsheets under a tree

Today I decided to watch Winnie The Pooh

to connect with the child inside me

to feel that peace, and to say thank you

for playing in the sun under that tree

as that’s when my love for nature grew

playing in the garden until the sun sleeps

sometimes I need to reach the girl I once knew

to take back those memories that she keeps

Feeling music

Oh you can wait

But I’ve waited for so long

I’ve listened to the radio everyday, waiting to hear that song

I can’t put my finger on which one

Just one that makes me feel

A memory from my childhood

Or something that wasn’t real

Something once created in my head

Which my mind is trying to claw back

Reminiscing on things that weren’t even said

In a pantomime that I have to act

Maybe the smell of freshly cut grass

Before school when I’d open my window

Or walking to work on that same path

That I first heard Take Care years ago

When Mom used to play Aretha Franklin

She’d say a little prayer for me

Now even when I’m panicking

I can hear it playing so clearly

Morning walks with wet hair

I never learned my lesson

I can’t catch a cold out there

If I welcome it as a blessing

Maybe Blackbird by the Beatles

Or Cherry Wine by Hozier

The sound of birds could defeat it all

Or maybe I just need some closure

Redbone by Gambino

Or even Feels like Summer

As even goosebumps I feel, though

That warmth is never far from her

Hovis

So much joy in the littlest being

You make my day without even seeing

The small things to me, to you life’s greatest pleasure

Sitting in that circle window, peering out at your leisure

Heart of a lion, yet so caring and gentle

Just an animal, yet so sentimental

You speak in codes, which I can decrypt with feeling

The part in me which I needed healing

Your rough tongue on my nose, a symbol of affection

You sit at my feet, you are my protection

I hope til’ I’m 40, that you’ll still be with me

In an ideal world, forever my best friend you will be

Dancing in the dark

I’ve found it too much fun dancing in the dark

For my footwork is impeccable and timing to the nearest mark

It’s a beautiful thing to dance to your own music

Keeping hold of beat so that you don’t lose it

A loud silence echoing off of old stone walls

Whilst my feet move in perfect time to the calls

Even sometimes I dance to the sweet bird song

Under the moonlight, as it casts a shadow so strong

At the first quarter is when i feel I dance my best

As that’s when darkness tends to my every request

I can finally let go and my feet feel alive

Til’ the next full moon, I hope I will survive

If I live til’ autumn

If I live til’ autumn, I think I’ll finally be free

As for so long, the darkness has coddled me

My colours now dampened by the cold winter dew

Whilst I beckon to you summer, in order to feel brand new

Here I fall gracefully, from the oak trees clutch

Reaching back to you, but still just out of touch

Waiting for autumn wind, to take me over the greenery

Where with each wave, I’ll soak up the scenery

Once the trees let me go, I can finally be free

As for so long, they have been keeping hold of me

I know it’s time to go, I can feel it deep inside

The wind blows ferociously

Vulnerable – and nowhere to hide

Shedding the burnt orange, to embrace an emerald green

If I live til’ autumn, the greatest journey ever seen

I won’t be here for long, and I can’t live forever

Autumn winds felt heavy, but lifted me like a feather

I’m not sure now, that I will live to see the day

The day where, the autumn winds lifted me away

Peggy & John

i can’t thank you enough for all that you’ve done

i cant win a prize that’s already been won

to be your granddaughter and all these wonderful years

lyme regis beaches or wiping my tears

if I could have one more walk on that beach

i would tell you my love for you is out of reach

it spreads so far and wide around all of the earth

it’s enough love to live another life’s worth

i knew this when I was young but thought we had so much time

the time has slipped away, a bigger mountain now to climb

if I could have one more ride home from school in that volvo

i wouldn’t hide in the back seat and take up the whole row

i would look to you and grandad sitting in the front

reach over and beep the horn, to show my classmates i had won

a prize more valuable than anything ever

Peggy and John – my greatest treasures

Waves

The waves washed me away

Fickle and fragile I fled with hope

Of not drowning with these thoughts of

What I must do and should have said

The apprehension of time passing

How the waves carry it away so fleetingly

Before you know it you are 30

Innocence now swallowed by the animals

The same animals who set me free

In dreams of becoming Cesar Milan

Where my whispers reached a thousand ears

I spoke softly but never enough

Words clouded, forcing rain down fast

Making tides stronger

Taking me away

Raw

Raw like a crunchy carrot

Full of goodness

5 of your 5 a day

Full of colour

I am raw

Authentic and organic

Like a freshly squeezed smoothie

A sweet grape

A sour banana

A bitter strawberry

Refreshing like a lemon

Natures creation

Grown on this Earth

From the Earth

To be enjoyed everyday

Sweet & sour

Sometimes not wanted

But always needed

I think, I know

I think sometimes I feel too much

I wonder if that makes me weak

Emotions stand tall and I’m falling at their feet

I think I’m scared of failure

It eats me up inside

So to avoid that feeling, sometimes I just sit by

I think I look for how to be different

Instead of appreciating myself

I want happiness to glow from me, to be my biggest wealth

I think sometimes my poems aren’t good enough

I’m never going to make it great

Spread my words far and wide to help people who can relate

I know sometimes I feel too much

But I am certain that makes me strong

The greatest gift in life, is to feel the lyrics in a song

I don’t need to be afraid of failing

As better opportunities aren’t always exposed

Sometimes sat waiting behind the door that was just closed

I know I don’t need to be different

I give off the energy I embrace

As I only take in positivity, that’s what I will display

This is the best poem I’ve ever written

As it speaks the greatest volumes

Just the simplest words sung to the catchiest tune

Maybe…

I wonder what I could’ve been

A version of myself that remains to be seen

I really hope she will come out soon

I’m leaving her enough room

Maybe the world isn’t ready

It’s now forced me to take it steady

I can’t shine forever if I use all my light

I need to save some in order to stay bright

Maybe I’ll preserve it and carry it on with me

The brightest star you’ll ever see

Maybe in another lifetime I do exist

Fulfil all of the things my mind made me miss

Those nights that you wish would never end

Listening to music with your favourite friend

Maybe one day I’ll become one of those nights

A star in the sky that will always shine bright

Look down on myself laughing with friends

This time I’ll make sure the night never ends