Eating alone

I fear that you’ll never let go

I’ve tried ushering you away

Like an ant in a built-up town

I’m trying to find you a new home

I am a tired bee and I’ve pollenated you

But you’ve run out of sugar water

You used it all in the cups of tea I made us

They’ve gone cold and the kettle has run out of water

Like a pigeon eating out the palm of a child

You peck until my hands are sore

These hands need to be preserved

So I can build you a new home

You drain me like pasta water

I can add it to my cooking but I want to eat alone

I only lit a candle for one

I know you hold enough fire for us both

But I don’t want to feel that heat anymore

I must let go of the old me

Maybe…

I wonder what I could’ve been

A version of myself that remains to be seen

I really hope she will come out soon

I’m leaving her enough room

Maybe the world isn’t ready

It’s now forced me to take it steady

I can’t shine forever if I use all my light

I need to save some in order to stay bright

Maybe I’ll preserve it and carry it on with me

The brightest star you’ll ever see

Maybe in another lifetime I do exist

Fulfil all of the things my mind made me miss

Those nights that you wish would never end

Listening to music with your favourite friend

Maybe one day I’ll become one of those nights

A star in the sky that will always shine bright

Look down on myself laughing with friends

This time I’ll make sure the night never ends

Stay or go

I’m too scared to go and everyone around me is moving

I’ve watered my flowers but now they’re not blooming

Visions of myself staying and leaving

Living in the unknown or living here not breathing

I can’t do it alone

I’m so far from home

So removed from myself I can’t see clearly

Uncertainty is moving closer and it’s moving fiercely

I just want to laugh

I just want to love

I just want to live simply

I just want to hug

I want to breathe again and to feel that clarity

Inhale sunshine rainbows and all the things I want to see

These dark thoughts aren’t me

But they come so closely

They’re messing with my identity

I know I want to give love and feel it in return

That’s the clearest notion I ever did learn

My love for animals and my love for life

My urge to succeed and need to survive

The love for my boyfriend and my family so great

I need to get back to a place where it’s safe

A Journey of Self Discovery

A means to a journey

a destination to follow

water between their toes

they can dip them where its shallow

aimlessly trekking across the depths of the land

where the sea meets the sand

to find a hidden treasure

then happiness they will not measure

leading the way was a man named Jack

armed with a spade tied to his back

yet to know what he was in search of

but all he knew was that it felt like love

buried deep under the stars that radiate 

he will dig until the sea does stagnate 

as he is the Jack of Spades 

and this is his escapade

 

In a boat a few miles down the shore

sat a few men who were there to explore 

but unlike the Jack of Spades

seen this in a more humorous way

they didn’t take their journey too seriously 

they were just searching out of curiosity

both heavy drinkers and both heavy smokers 

these men were called The Jokers

 

Off the coast watching the stars was a man unnamed

he embarked on this journey to find the same 

he hoped it would bring some magic into the routine of his life

a regular golf player with a young wife

he spent most of his time searching for vintage golf equipment 

that seemed to be his greatest mission

the recognition came in floods

He was called the King of Clubs 

 

This hidden treasure belonged to the Queen

a massive rock that would always gleam

she was said to have planted it here years ago 

as to why, we do not know

we know the treasures did not make her content 

discarding her most expensive diamond was a way to vent

but after all of this, it had came to be

that The Queen Of Diamonds had thrown it in the sea

so all that was left for the men to foresee

was a journey of self discovery.